what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know š
So many questions so Iāll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
You told him he ācould park his dick in your garageā.
Well he didnāt. It shouldnāt be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
