I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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