She said her name was "party"
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I'm always down for nudity.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
