Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.