I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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