New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
