Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
