i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize