I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
