Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
