My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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