Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
