At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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