10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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