But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
