I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
