I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
