I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.