at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Yo dont text me then not text me
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
