If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Randomize
