just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Randomize
