She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize