you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
