Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
