he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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