Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
someone get that fucking seahorse.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
