thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
