I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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