i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
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