are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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