Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
