I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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