Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize