To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I puked a lego.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
