And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
