after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Randomize
