I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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