I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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