I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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