can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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