You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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