I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
