That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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