I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
