hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
