just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
i think my cat just said my name.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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