all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
