Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Drunk walkin through police station. America
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
