I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize