some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
