You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
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