I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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